Short story: Devakirubai: Grace of Lord the Almighty

By P. SaravanaManikandan In Tamil.

Translated by

M.Chithra Rajam

chithrarajam@gmail.com

And

K. Muruganandhan

Send2kmn@gmail.com

        

  Balu sir made a phone call during a school lunch break. "Tamilvanan thambi! Is there any service center for Philips in Aruppukottai?”

"Why, sir, what’s the issue?"

“Just wanted to buy a Philips radio thambi”.

"What sir? Do you still listen to radio stations?"

"Oh no! It’s not for me… It is for Rosy akka. Do you remember her? She was in Mariya home. She has been asking for a Radio for a long time. Philips alone would suit well in quality and design.

Ask for its availability in Aruppukottai and let me know. I will visit there and buy it for her. Otherwise, I will have to go to Townhall in Madurai. The problem is not about travelling there…” He continued talking.

 

“Where’s she in Aruppukkottai now?" Asked Tamil.

“She stays in a hostel near old bus stand it seems. I didn't visit her either. Talking to her only through phone. She feels very bored. That’s why thought of getting her a radio…”. Balu passed on the responsibility to Tamil and hung up the phone.

 

Balu sir is a blind, a retired graduate teacher. While Tamilvanan was studying in a middle school for the blind In the 90s run by a Christian congregation, he worked as a teacher in the town's government high school. Like Balu sir, Tamilvanan has also become a graduate teacher now.

Tamilvanan has a bleak memory of Balu Sir's house that was just a leap away behind his school compound. But he has a strong memory of the Mariya Home Balu Sir was just talking about. It was situated in another corner of his school campus, where a nursery school for the blind children called 'Little Class' was also running.

Senior Blind girls who had stopped their education at eighth standard and elderly blind women who were neglected by their relatives because of their disability were at the Mariya Home.

Like the Mariya Home, the Britto Home for senior Blind boys and elderly blind men was also situated close to his hostel. Both men and women, over twenty years of age, were staying and carrying out weaving work in these separate homes. The school and these homes were all administered by the Church.

He had never visited the Mariya Home, as he was a boy and because of the distance. He doesn’t remember now, perhaps he had been  there a couple of times.

But it was quite another story with the Britto Home. As it was near his hostel, most of the boys like Tamil spent their evenings there.

In the dormitory of their school hostel, fifteen boys stayed together in a room, spread mats on the floor in a row, and three of them had to sleep on two mats. But in Britto home, Tapestry cots had been allotted to the senior boys, with just two or three of them occupying each room. Free from the burden of study and homework, the senior boys could listen to songs freely from radio sets of their own. Like these , there were many reasons which had special attraction for the boys in Britto home. Students were repeatedly reprimanded by teachers for developing this attraction. However, their trips continued unabated.

Not only the student boys, but also the senior boys looked forward to the visits of their younger ones. They perhaps found solace in filling their laps with the young boys and warming  their mind in the conversations. Carrying the boys on their shoulders, the sweetened flavor of the mint candy the annas bought from Madhav Annan's cupboard shop hadn’t faded away still. Even now, Tamil got excited with the piling memories of these nostalgic feelings.

Tamil said to himself, “It was the golden age of immense love and affection. Without even realizing, we were applying ointment, plucking out the sores that had festered in them due to neglect.”

Tamil lamented that time has made those two homes non-existent today. Where would all of them have gone? Many might have died.Madhav Anna's age was already fifty years old then…Tamil’s mind started reminiscing old times.

He doesn’t remember Rosy Akka at all. Whenever he gets reminded of the Mariya Home, the name Devakirubai alone poured bunch of thorns into his memories. Everyone called her Krupa. Rosy akka had to leave that enchanting forest among the uprooted trees. But Kirupa Akka's wings were broken and she was exiled from the oasis that had flourished in her time.

Krupa is a child of God. She was brought up by that school from childhood. She had never experienced her mother's lap. She had spent her childhood only amidst the harsh and dry words of the nurses. She passed her twenties clinging to the gospel words of Jesus, ignorant of anything that life denied her like love, warmth and care.

All the senior boys and girls would be talking amidst the sound of the loom 'katak katak',  except Krupa Akka. While elders would be complaining about their inabilities mixed with sarcasm, The focus of all youngsters would be on Krupa Akka who persisted with her work without uttering a word. Moreover, Sundaram Annan would always tease Krupa Akka.

Krupa would speak her heart out to only two people. One was Lord the almighty. Another was Desammal aayaa of her home who had become bedridden due to old age. Krupa had made it her daily duty to serve Deshammal. She would narrate Deshammal everything that happened during the working hours. In particular, she would complain about Sundaram's mischiefs and her resultant irritation.

Desammal alone could console Krupa. Desammal knew how to pacify Krupa By saying some divine versus like 'Love others as yourself’, ‘whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.

’.

Sundaram was then 25. Sundaram's condition was worse than that of Krupa. He lost everything one after the other, like loving parents, prosperous wealth and close relationships. At the age of seven, Sundaram stood completely orphaned. Blindness became an adage, he nevertheless appeared happy. There was a stock of crowd around him always, as there was no dearth of entertainment wherever he was.          

For the past few days, everyone in the loom had been talking about their mates Pandi and Ponnamma. The elopement they had executed  was being described as an act of bravery by some and absolute disobedience by others. Between them, Kiruba agreed with the second group. According to her, the act of her friend Ponnammal, who was not loyal to that institution, seemed disgusting. Everyone was talking that it was Sundaram, who had given them courage and had sent them safely on their way.  Krupa's hatred for Sundaram got increased further. 

“Anna! You are a great man. Though I am always with you how come you did such a great job  even without ,my knowledge !" John exclaimed. “Hey! You are after all a small boy daa!”, Sundaram laughed the matter off.

“But Perumal Anna also said the same about you, ‘We took Sundaram lightly. Now see what a great  thing he has done!’. When Perumal anna said so, our Muruga annan laughed out saying, ‘Take him for a young brave lad". “Our Sabarimuthu annan said that Pastor is very angry with you. Even All akkas are talking only about you”.

“Which akka do you mean?” Sundaram asked, expecting something specific. “Everyone. Why? Daisy Akka, Shanti Akka. That too, you should see Shanti akka’s face! I think Shanti akka will be the next in line requiring  your help”.

"Hey!  Didn’t Mercy or devakirubai say anything about this?" Sundaram asked curiously. 

“Who those reserved ladies? they themselves can’t hear what they speak. Atleast some sounds peep out from Devakrupa akka while singing the song and reading verses. This Mercy, even when singing sounds as if singing from the bottom of a well. These are very stubborn ladies… They are children of the congregation. They will show their loyalty only to the congregation for sure. This kiruba akka in particular, is always immersed in songs and prayers… chai chai!” John spoke with a lot of irritation.

"Hey! speaking as if you are a big lad? Don’t talk too much, go to work.” said Sundaram and sent John away to Madhav Anna's shop giving him some coins.

‘so reserved…’ so stubborn… John's words were echoing in his mind. “Being fair complexioned and beautiful would make people arrogant”. Sundaram drew a canvas of Kiruba within himself. Even though he was ignorant of colors, he had gained the knowledge through people's words that beauty means fair complexion. But all he thought of Kiruba as fair complexioned and beautiful was only because of her voice.

What a soft, bright voice. Of all her words, how damn nice it is to listen to the word 'stothram' coming out from her parted lips crossing the throats. This whole world’s beauty won’t match for that monosyllabic sound 'S'. He offered his gratitude to Lord the almighty who made humans to utter the word stothram’ very often.

"Do you see how dare he has grown?” Krupa gritted her teeth.

"Who?" Desammal asked in a low voice.

“That Sundaram of course. He knows no obedience at all Aayaa. He only has induced the affair between Ponnamma and Pandi and helped them elope. Is it enough only if you pray in high pitch voice? Do you know which verse he chose to say during today’s prayer?"

"Which verse was that?” Deshammal asked.

“‘The fear of the Lord is the of wisdom.’ What propriety does he have to say this verse?” Kiruba said, gritting her teeth. "Fellows like him who disobey Lord the almighty and the congregation of his creation must be thrown out immediately by the neck".

"Krupa! God came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

Have you forgotten this verse?” Deshammal said this in a low voice to calm down Krupa. Desammal's condition suddenly worsened after pacifying Krupa. She was admitted to a nearby hospital administered by the congregation.

Sundaram, along with Mariya Home Warden sister Esther volunteered to do chores for Desammal.

Now Krupa was left alone in her room without desammal. She felt like crying. She wanted to see Deshammal right away.

Krupa thought how Esther would treat desammal even on normal days. She was worried about the ill-treatment of Esther that Deshammal might have to bear at the hospital. Krupa visited desammal accompanied by a friend who had low-vision. Desammal said appreciative words about the services Sundaram rendered for her in a low voice.

While she was narrating, all the opinions of Kirupa about Sundaram began to crumble one by one like the chains  that bound Jesus' hands and feet got crumbled during his resurrection.

Kiruba ended up staying in the hospital with Desammal after Esther Warden's usual escape from her responsibilities due to sure apathy and intolerance.

Everything was bit difficult for her at the beginning as she hadn’t ever taken a step alone in a new place. But Sundaram’s casual moving around the place gave her a new courage since he was also totally blind.

“Esther Akka told me I must stay”, Kiruba spoke to him for the first time. He felt an indescribable ecstasy emerging inside him. Sundaram felt as if he was under the possession of some divine force right then. He identified her words with the very voice of an angel announcing the birth of the Messiah to the shepherds.

Clearing her throat a little, doubting that he didn't hear what she said, kiruba said, “Esther …”. Yes of course. She will have a lot of work to do like going to church and attending to the prayers." Sundaram intervened as soon as she started. Kiruba could recognize the sarcasm in his voice.

“Why is she so unkind?” kiruba asked. "What else? Lord the almighty will forgive seven and even seventy times, that’s why!”. Kirupa laughed out her heart.

“Kiruba! Is it really you laughing? Do you know even to laugh?” Sundaram asked to himself. The entire situation was pleasing to him, yet surprising. At that moment, he felt that out of all the people in the world, the eternal gaze of the Son of God the almighty was fixed on him alone.

Desammal's ailing health dragged on without an end. Sundaram did everything like cleaning her bed and scooping her poo with at most sincerity. Kiruba was pleased with Sundaram who was giving shape to the scriptural words hitherto preached to her by his actions. When Desammal passed away at last, Sundaram's fondness and his comforting words consoled Kiruba.

Kiruba spoke casually to Pandi Ponnammal couple who joined them for Desammal's funeral. She felt elated to imagine herself and Sundaram in the position of their intimacy. Kirupa held to the staunch belief that very God the almighty alone, who took Desammal to himself, had sent Sundaram to accomplish his promising versus, ‘I will be with thee: I will not fail thee, nor forsake thee.’

Kirupa chose the Good Friday falling on the forthcoming week to disclose the love cherished in her heart. That one week passed like an everlasting age for her. On the Good Friday, she sent her friends away to the church for the Way of the Cross adoration, telling them that she would join them in a short while.

She Called Sundaram to her hostel room, to meet him alone in a secluded environment. Sundaram stood leaning on the porch pillar of the hostel. He could recognize that Kirupa, who was standing in front of him, was little shorter than him in height. "Is everyone gone?" Sundaram asked.

“Yes. Even Ester is gone”.

“Why didn’t you go then?" Sundaram asked with surprise.

"I lied I’m not keeping well. This is the first time in my life that I haven’t been to the Way of the Cross adoration”. Sundaram felt so proud and overwhelmed that she had done everything for him. It was the first time that he experienced the love and kindness of a woman in such a close proximity. Kirupa opened up her heart and started talking.

"Let's get married. But not like Pandi and Ponnamma. Let's have it in this very church", said Kirupa in a calm voice with great confidence and determination. Everything seemed astonishing for Sundaram. He wanted to kneel down and offer his gratitude to Lod the almighty. Before he could answer, Kirupa continued. "I don't know whether you know or not, but I was brought up by this congregation. Around Five to six children like me have been brought up here. Although you’ve lost your father and mother, you will have someone to count as your relative. But this place has meant everything for us”, she spoke with great maturity and poise. "Our school correspondent Glady Amma has a lot of love and affection for us. Once she returns from abroad the next week, we both will meet her and talk to her. I'm sure she will understand," Kirupa said decisively. Sundaram agreed to follow her words as the suggestion appeared to be the most sensible course of action.

“Our wedding will definitely take place”, reassured Sundaram.

"How do you say that?" Kiruba asked.

"Because the grace of Lord the almighty, Devakirubai, is very much with me". She got euphoric by his reply and laughed in profuse appreciation. Sundaram felt as if pearls were just falling and scattering on the marble floor.

He wanted to feel her by touch. Though they had walked hand-in-hand around the hospital yard so many times earlier, the present desire arouse inside him since those particular hands and fingers had just become rightfully his own. But how to ask? While he hesitated, Another question also arose within him; whether the same desire would have sprouted within her as well.

Kiruba started walking towards her room when he was immersed in these thoughts. Sundaram could feel the pain to be his own when her forehead dashed against the half-closed room door. Holding something in her right hand, she extended her left arm and walked slowly out of the room to avoid the door slamming her again. She extended her hand to give him a Karachevu snacks pocket.

“what is this?” Sundaram asked.

“This is Karasev. isn’t today the Good Friday? Take a bite of this instead of spinach in the afternoon. I know you don’t like to eat spinach. That's why I asked Reji Akka who went to the shop to buy it for you. Wondering how do I know? I overheard your conversation with Muthaiya in the loom workshop yesterday. Don't keep yourself hungry. Then I will also remain hungry”. Kirupa pleaded to him in a caressing tone mixed with blushing.

Sundaram got ecstatic and held her hand tight along with the Karachevu pocket. He drew her close to his side. “Hey! Have you gone mad? Let me go.”, Krupa's lips uttered those words even as she stood a willing captive to his embrace. Be it for a few seconds, strange halos appeared inside both of them and they were witnessing a new illumination.

"kiruba!" Suddenly a voice broke in. Both of them were shocked as they recognized it to be Esther warden’s voice. "what is this? What are you doing here without going to church? What Sundaram, not going to veneration? How long has this been going on?” Esther rebuked with commanding authority. Both of them got dismayed and stood without answering.

Locking them inside, Esther ran to tell the matter to pastor Peter who was temporarily taking care of the responsibilities of the congregation. Kirupa wept in desperation. As She couldn't bear to imagine what was going to happen next, she busted into tears. Sundaram was thoroughly perplexed. Just one thing appeared clear to him, that something terrible was about to happen. However, he was trying to pacify Kirupa. Along with Esther, Voices of five or six young men could be heard at the door step. Sundaram could recognize some voices familiar to him. They were the sons of employees working in various departments of the congregation. They must have been sent by the pastor who was already very angry with Sundaram.

George opened the door and rushed towards Sundaram. He was the son of the sacrist working as a policeman outside the town. They dragged Sundaram with them. Kirupa wailed in agony. Just then, the first bell for the way of Cross could be heard ringing. Kirupa felt as if it was announcing an impending danger instead of proclaiming mercy. Esther dragged Krupa away. The way of Cross meditation began just then.

“You blind bitch! Can't you just eat off the food here and keep shut?” Esther slapped Kiruba alternately on her cheeks and back. Kirupa's whole body was filled with fear as she could not even sense the direction of her attacker’s hand. She fell on the ground crying.

She heard the preaching of pastor, “The Son of God is bearing his cross went forth into a place called the place of a skull, which is called in the Hebrew Golgotha”. She thought about Sundaram. Her weeping grew more desperate as she imagined how savagely those men would be beating him up. She imagined herself to have become a big cross that Sundaram could not bear.

The young men put Sundaram in a closed room and beat him down severely.  He was attacked from all sides. Sabarimuthu’s son kicked him saying, "how dare have you grown you orphan fellow! Everything is because of blind impishness”!

Someone slapped him on the cheek saying, "It was because of this fellow why the pastor’s name got spoiled”.

‘Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do!' Jesus' first utterance on the cross was being meditated in the church. Sundaram had already fainted, without the strength to even ask ‘I thirst’.

“Please let us go”. Kiruba was imploring to Esther. "Where will you go? With that fellow? Don’t you know he is a thief? Remember our warden Xavier Sir's chain was missing? He is the one who has stolen it. He would be in jail by now. He can never come out again”. Kirupa was not ready to believe any of Esther's words. she wept more and more thinking about the plight of herself and Sundaram.

Already the Pandi Ponnamma affair, Now Sundaram and Kirupa. There were also many problems in the administration. The pastor realized that it would become more complicated  if Glady Amma became aware of these developments, who had entrusted him with the management responsibility while leaving abroad. In order to wrap things up before she returned home, the pastor decided to send Kirupa to another institution run by the same congregation.

He conveyed his decision to Esther and sent some young men to accompany her.

No more Sundaram in the vicinity; he will not come and she too would not be here. Kiruba could instantly feel the darkness that would descend on the doom's day of the world as prophesied in the scriptures upon realizing her present situation. ‘My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?' The words of the Holy Son on the cross was melting in the air for her.

Kirupa was sent to some other nest. Now she went only after having grown aware of everything that life denied her like wish, desire, love, marriage and family. The two-hour Way of the Cross adoration came to an end. Pastor was informed ‘It is finished’.

In a few years, Sundaram got married and had children. His life went on as usual. Although blind, he was male. But that was definitely impossible for Kirupa. More than a woman, she was a destitute and a blind. In another congregation, she would be participating in another church service. Afterwards, she would have never got a chance to miss the way of cross adoration.

Her lips were created to utter the verses of Lord the almighty and her chest was made to carry God's cross. She would surely survive by convincing herself “it’s all the grace of Lord the almighty, Devakirubai. “